I think most can say that when they first became a mom, they were winging it. Doesn’t matter how many articles and books you read. How many pins you have on your “preparing to be a mommy” board on Pinterest. Or how many people give you their advice “tidbits.” Yes I mean Susan who nudges your pregnant self in the grocery store and says “oh my gosh, you are huge. You are about to pop! Are you sure it’s not twins? Can I give you a tid bit?” Yeah, I hate Susan too. But it doesn’t matter… nothing, not even Susan, can prepare you for becoming a mother. However, I really wish I knew about a few things before I did become a mom. You know, things no one tells you and resources you never knew about. So I’m sharing 3 things I wish I had been told before becoming a mother and 3 resources I wish I would have had. Seriously, they really would have helped!
- There is a website that sets you up with the perfect breast pump, one that is covered by insurance. And the website does ALL of the work. You fill out the qualification form, let Aeroflow contact your insurance and your doctors office, and then a breast pump gets delivered to you! It’s quite amazing and saves so much time! Here is the link to qualify for a breast pump..
- There is a website that helps you find the PERFECT baby carrier that fits your exact needs. When I was pregnant with my first son I had added a random baby carrier to my registry which a family member had eventually purchased for me. But it was the totally wrong carrier for me. It was a great carrier, but it didn’t suit ME and what was good for my baby at the time. I ended up having to ask other moms about their carriers before I could return the one I had and purchase a new one. Little did I know that there was a website called Solution Bay that had the answer to my problems. They have an actual baby carrier guide that helps you find the carrier specific to your needs and child! It’s amazing. Plus it’s super easy to purchase off of amazon once you are matched with your carrier. You can find the guide here.
- The app, Winnie, is like your one stop shop for finding family friendly things to do and for support! The app Winnie is almost like Groupon mixed with a mommy support group. You type in your location and it generates links for tons of things to do, places to go, and services to use that are family friendly and fit the criteria you are looking for. But, it also doubles as a social forum where parents, of kids all ages, can find support. I really needed an app like this when my first son was born. I was constantly posting things to my Facebook page and asking questions. Plus, I was all over google trying to find things for my baby to do. Winnie, makes all of it SO EASY. Sign up, here.
My “Tid bits”
- Breastfeeding HURTS the first couple of days. Prepare yourself for some pain. Not actually on your breast. Supposedly if it hurts, then you are doing it wrong. But when you first have a baby your uterus needs to shrink back down to size. Every time you breastfeed, it sends a message to your uterus to contract (that’s the part that hurts) and shrink back down to pre-baby size. Everyone’s body is different. The pain only lasted for a few days for me and I was extremely relieved once it was over. Despite the pain, I was happy to know my body was doing its job and my baby house was shrinking. *Disclaimer* I am not making any medical claims. I’m just reporting what I was told from various doctors and nurses while in the hospital. If you are having any kind of pain while breastfeeding please alert your doctor and lactation consultant. I’m not a medical professional and my claims could be wrong.
- Set up support before your baby is born. After your baby is born, so much can happen. You are sleep deprived, you are learning so many new things so fast, and you might even have a little postpartum. All of those things can lead to you really needing support AND help. But funny enough, sometimes those things lead to you not wanting to ask for support or help. You might feel like people will think you are a bad mother if you ask for help. Or maybe that your baby is too hard for others to take care of. There a million reasons (excuses really) you might tell yourself. But the truth is, you might NEED the help, and that is totally okay. If you get in touch with some family and friends NOW before the baby is born, you won’t have to worry about asking later. Ask for your support to check in on you, or schedule for them to bring you hot meals. Or even have people come over to wash your dishes or watch the baby so you can sleep for an hour. Trust me, you will thank me on this one!
- Be prepared to be “mom shamed.” Mom shaming is a trend right now…a very sad one. Everyone wants to tell you what you are doing wrong. Be ready to ignore them. Everyone who becomes a mom is becoming one for the first time. Even if you have 3 children, each time their child was born it was their first time being a mom to THAT child. No one 100% knows what they are doing, all the time. Every child is different. NO ONE is an expert. Give yourself a break. Take a deep breathe. You will be such a good mom, please don’t let anyone shame you into thinking you won’t be. Repeat after me, “I am a good mom.”
So, you go mama! You go and you wing it. When you have that baby your mothering instincts are going to kick in. You are going to learn as you go. Learn about your baby and your body and how they are different from everyone else. You are never going to be perfect, but you are going to do so amazing. I hope this article helped you more than Susan at the grocery store.
Anything you wish someone had told you or showed you before you became a mom? Leave me a comment!